Struggling To Find My Passion? – Here Is How To Fix It

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Just like many others from my generation, I grew up hearing that I could be anything I wanted when I grew up. In my early years, I had dreams of pursuing acting, singing, and even becoming a veterinary pharmacist (yes, it’s a true story!).

The quest to discover my true passion consumed me, and this pursuit continued well into my adult life. Interestingly, all this time, I overlooked what I was naturally good at, such as my ability to empathize, my passion for writing, and an insatiable curiosity about human behavior.

They often say that hindsight is 20/20, and today I can clearly see how these strengths have shaped my career. However, for a long while, I was on a passionate hunt, as if it were a hidden treasure chest that I just needed a map to uncover.


Why Finding Your Passion Is a Myth?

Contrary to what we often hear, passion is something that gradually unfolds over time. It’s a discovery made through the journey of life itself. Furthermore, that elusive “dream job” isn’t a fixed destination; it’s in a constant state of evolution. What you consider your ideal career in your early 30s might not fit the bill by the time you hit 40.

So, what do you do if you’re feeling completely clueless about your passion or life’s purpose?

First and foremost, don’t panic. Uncovering your purpose isn’t a quick process. It’s a messy and ongoing endeavor that requires time, patience, and a healthy dose of self-reflection. You’ll find your way, but it all begins with taking those initial small steps.

Start by asking yourself some fundamental questions about how your past experiences, challenges, and victories have molded you into the person you are today.

Powerful Questions to Uncover Your Purpose

Let’s get introspective! Take a few moments to explore these questions, and don’t hold back. Write freely and let your thoughts flow, even if they seem a little unconventional.

1.  Think about the top three peak experiences in your life. What ties them together? What do they reveal about you?
Those peak moments in life, let’s see… They all involved connecting with people, whether it was traveling with friends, celebrating personal achievements, or simply enjoying shared laughter. What this says about me is that I thrive on meaningful relationships and shared experiences.


2.  If money were no obstacle, how would you spend your days?
Ah, the dream scenario! I’d spend my days immersed in the world of wildlife conservation, working hands-on to protect endangered species and their habitats. The idea of making a real difference in the natural world has always pulled at my heartstrings.

3.  Reflect on the dreams you’ve let slip away. Why did you give up on them? Was fear a factor? Did your values shift? How can you rekindle those forgotten passions?
One dream I let go of was becoming a professional musician. Fear of instability and societal pressure led me down a different path. To reignite that musical spark, I could start jamming with friends again, even if it’s just for fun. Life’s too short to let fear hold me back!

4.  What’s the toughest challenge you’ve conquered? How has it shaped you?
The hardest thing I ever had to overcome was a battle with a serious illness. It tested my resilience, taught me the importance of gratitude, and made me more compassionate toward others facing similar struggles. It’s a reminder that I can weather even the fiercest storms.

5.  When does time seem to fly by?
Time vanishes when I’m engrossed in a good book. It’s like entering another universe where hours feel like minutes. It tells me that storytelling and creativity hold a special place in my heart.

These questions dive deep into the depths of self-discovery. But remember, introspection alone won’t get you there; you need consistent action to turn your dreams into reality. So, take that step, and who knows, your passion might have been waiting within you all along, just waiting for that spark to ignite.

7 Reasons To Understand Struggling To Find My Passion

Discovering your passion isn’t a one-size-fits-all journey. Some folks appear to have it figured out from day one, while others embark on a lifelong quest to find it.

Here’s the undeniable truth: we all yearn to fill our days with what truly lights our souls on fire. But what if you’re still navigating in a foggy direction, uncertain of where to go?

Often, the reason your genuine calling eludes you is that you might be putting your focus in the wrong places. So, let’s dive into 7 common reasons why you might not have unearthed your passion yet—and what steps you can take to change that.

7 Reasons You Haven’t Found Your Passion Yet:

  1. All you think about is finding your passion
  2. You’re searching for feeling before experience
  3. You’re staying the course
  4. You’re looking for direction and clarity
  5. You’re not creating something
  6. You’re looking to live your life all at once instead of moment-by-moment
  7. You haven’t dedicated yourself to a goal

1. All you think about is finding your passion

When you embark on the quest to discover your true calling, it’s easy to become consumed by the search. However, constantly questioning yourself with, “What am I truly passionate about?” often yields limited results.

The truth is, you won’t stumble upon your passion by endlessly delving into the depths of your mind. Passions are born from actions and experiences, not from idle contemplation.

2. You’re searching for feeling before experience

Passions are born from our life experiences. If you’re waiting to feel passionate about something before actually engaging in it, you might be in for a long wait.

Think about it this way: would you expect to fall in love with an artist’s work before even listening to their music? It wouldn’t make sense, right? Similarly, you can’t expect to be passionate about woodcarving if you’ve never tried your hand at it or witnessed someone in action.

Passion typically emerges after you’ve had a firsthand experience, not before. It’s the result of doing, not just wishing or imagining.

3. You’re staying the course

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with pursuing a long-term goal or sticking to a certain path for an extended period.

However, it’s crucial not to let your unwavering commitment to that ultimate goal blind you to the opportunities that may unexpectedly pop up along the way. Surprisingly, some of the most rewarding possibilities might begin as side gigs, hobbies, or even chance encounters.

Rather than getting tunnel-vision focused on just one area, consider embracing the fresh opportunities that occasionally come your way. Life has a way of surprising us with unexpected doors to open, so why not take advantage of them when they appear?

4. You’re looking for direction and clarity

Many of us believe that once we discover our passion, we’ll gain perfect clarity and know precisely how to navigate our lives.

If only it were that straightforward! Life is an ongoing series of perplexing situations, and the truth is, you’ll never have all the answers. Regardless of the circumstances, we must make the best decisions we can at the moment and keep moving forward.

Finding your passion isn’t about having all the answers right from the start. It’s about taking that first step in a certain direction, staying attuned to what piques your interest along the journey, and then diving deeper into those intriguing areas as you go along. Life’s a dynamic process of exploration and learning.

5. You’re not creating something

A key distinction between those who are living their passion and those still on the quest is that the former group has taken the step of creating something. For some, it’s art; for others, it’s crafting a job, building a community program, or forging a career opportunity.

The act of creation holds significant value because it serves as a mirror that reflects back insights about ourselves. It’s through the process of pushing our boundaries and fashioning something entirely new that we uncover what truly matters to us, what we excel at, and what we’re willing to invest our time and energy into.

Certainly, crafting something from scratch isn’t a walk in the park, but it’s an essential undertaking. It’s in the act of creation that we discover not only our passion but also our purpose.

6. You’re looking to live your life all at once instead of moment-by-moment

Our quest to find our passion is part of a larger journey — the quest to understand what we should do with our lives, how we should invest our time on this incredible planet.

Yet, the challenge lies in the fact that when we look at our lives from such a grand perspective, it often hinders us from fully immersing ourselves in the present moment.

Discovering your passion unfolds through a series of small, incremental steps. It starts with hearing about it, perhaps from a book or a friend. Then you dip your toes into it by attending a class or an event. 

You give it a try on your own, and then you do it again. Gradually, it evolves into a hobby, and soon enough, you’re passionately sharing it with friends. Before you even realize it, you’ve stumbled upon your life’s calling.

But here’s the thing—it doesn’t happen overnight.

So, instead of fretting about what you’ll do with the rest of your life, take a moment to ponder what you can do to make today more enjoyable. How can you infuse this very moment with something that brings you joy and fulfillment? It’s in these smaller, everyday moments that you’ll inch closer to discovering your true passion.

7. You haven’t dedicated yourself to a goal

We all have interests, those things that catch our attention from time to time. However, more often than not, we treat them as passing interests that we revisit occasionally. Rarely do we take one of these interests and commit to pursuing a specific goal related to it.

Setting and striving for a goal is crucial because it sets in motion a chain of events that lead to unforeseen opportunities. When you embark on a journey toward a meaningful goal, you’ll encounter opportunities along the way that you could never have anticipated when you started.

In the grand scheme of things, whether you achieve your initial goal is not as vital as the journey itself and the unexpected opportunities it brings your way.

So, pursue your interests with intention and purpose, and you’ll discover that your passion has a knack for revealing itself along the way.

Try This If You’re Struggling to Find Your Passion

“Don’t worry about what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” ~Howard Thurman

Over the last three years, I’ve been wrestling with what some call a quarter-life crisis.

It all began just a few months into my first job, the kind that had me confined to a cubicle day in and day out. It was during that time that I had a profound epiphany that many of us encounter sooner or later: I’m going to spend the majority of my life working a job. If I want those years to be fulfilling and enjoyable, I need to align my work with my purpose and engage in activities that ignite my passions.


Recognizing the brevity of life and the importance of seizing the moment, I wholeheartedly immersed myself in reading and applying guidance on how to unearth and embrace my passion.

During my three-year quest, I actively explored a variety of avenues. I dabbled in hobbies that piqued my interest, delved into research on various careers, and engaged in candid conversations with friends about my strengths. 

I even encouraged my husband to embark on his own journey of finding his passions, believing that mutual support would fuel our dreams. Throughout it all, I remained patient and open, eagerly waiting for that spark of inspiration.

Before long, some of my passions began to surface in unmistakable ways.

I found immense joy in writing, relished one-on-one interactions, had a fascination for the world of business, embraced yoga, felt a deep connection with rescue animals, savored chocolate, cherished the ambiance of cozy coffee houses, and stayed updated through digital newspapers.

To test the waters and see which ideas truly resonated, I took bold steps. I ventured into entrepreneurship, switched careers, explored freelance writing, initiated a local yoga community, dedicated my time to volunteering, and through these endeavors, I embarked on a journey of self-discovery that allowed me to truly uncover who I am.


My endeavors to discover a passion that could turn into a career consistently followed a familiar pattern. I’d kick things off with an enormous burst of enthusiasm, achieve commendable results, and then, as if on cue, that quiet voice in my heart would gently whisper, “This isn’t your calling…there’s something else waiting for you out there.”

After a few years of trial and error in my quest to find that one enduring passion, I reached a point where I decided to hit pause on the search.

During this time, I threw myself into my job and began to reconcile with the idea that most people might not have careers that fully engage their passions—and perhaps that was okay. After all, I could still nurture my passions outside of work.

Yet, the longing to build a career around my true passion never truly faded away.

The turning point arrived one evening as my husband and I sat at home, watching “The Legend of Bagger Vance,” a movie centered around a struggling golfer who seeks guidance from an inspirational golf caddy named Baggar Vance.

In a pivotal scene, Baggar imparts these words of wisdom to the golfer:

“Inside each and every one of us is one true, authentic swing. Something we were born with. Something that’s uniquely ours, unteachable and unlearnable. Something that must be remembered.”


I sat there, momentarily stunned. Even as the movie continued, my thoughts remain fixated on one idea: the notion that your passion, your unique and genuine gift, is something that must be recalled and rekindled.

For the longest time, I had been on this relentless search, experimenting with new things, exploring various jobs, careers, and what seemed like “exciting” passions that existed outside of myself. Yet, in all that time, I had overlooked something crucial—I hadn’t tried to remember the passions that had been a part of me all along.

In a single moment of clarity, it hit me like a lightning bolt: throughout my entire life, I’d harbored a deep fascination with business and personal finance. My father and grandmother had been unwavering in their determination to impart knowledge about the flow of money and the freedom that could come from starting a business.

Through these consistent lessons while growing up, I’d unknowingly cultivated a keen interest in business that had silently permeated my life in ways I hadn’t fully recognized.

I recalled the moment when I was just nine years old, confiding in my grandmother about my dream to become a financial planner, to assist people with their business and financial matters, much like how she had guided me in developing those skills.

I also remembered those countless times I’d sit, completely engrossed, reading business magazines while aboard airplanes. It dawned on me that my true career desire had always been to one day run my own business. It was like discovering a deep, steady undercurrent that connected numerous phases of my life.


But how could my passion be so… plain? Aren’t passions supposed to be artistic, exotic, or inspirational? Aren’t passions supposed to wow people?

Maybe not. Maybe my passion for the everyday things could be a means to infuse life into what might seem like a mundane subject—similar to how your eccentric history teacher spoke rapidly and with enthusiasm about the Civil Rights movement, sparking your own excitement.

Ever since this revelation, I’ve embarked on a journey into the world of financial coaching, and it brings me immense joy. For the first time, that small voice in my heart is whispering, “You’re heading in the right direction!” I’m no longer distracted by thoughts of other potential pursuits. Even more delightful, I’m also finding ways to engage in my other passions.


If you’re struggling to find your passion, even after what feels like trying every avenue, I’d like to offer you this advice: take a moment to sit down, open up your journal, make yourself a soothing cup of tea, and attempt to recall your passions.

Take a trip down memory lane, reflect on the aspirations you held as a child, the habits that came to you effortlessly, the games you enjoyed, and the books that captured your imagination.

Then, consider how these elements from your past may have relevance in your present life and career. You might just be taken aback by the hidden connections that have been right there, waiting for you to uncover.

Struggling to Find Your Passion: Stop Worrying And Do This Instead

I’ve always believed that the advice to “Find your passion!” is some of the worst career guidance out there. Perhaps it’s because of my own experiences. I spent many years chasing a career in book publishing simply because I had an intense love for books.

However, I didn’t enjoy the jobs I had in that field, and I didn’t make much progress. It wasn’t until I found a job as a marketing executive at a business services company – a job that most people wouldn’t consider as something to be passionate about – that I truly enjoyed my work.

The notion that passion is a must for career happiness and success is somewhat misguided. This advice is based on two myths about passion, both of which have a kernel of truth but are ultimately flawed.

The first myth suggests that if you pursue what you love, eventually, you’ll become so skilled at it that you’ll be handsomely rewarded for your efforts. The advice stemming from this myth encourages people to ignore financial concerns when starting their careers because money will magically come pouring in after some unspecified period of pursuing their passion.

Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case. While it’s true that people tend to perform better in tasks they enjoy, not everyone excels at what they’re passionate about. There are many jobs where even the most skilled individuals don’t make much money (think of poets). This advice fails to address these realities.

The second myth is that if you find and follow your passion, you’ll be blissfully happy every moment of your working life. You’ve probably heard the cliché: “Do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life!”. 

Well, as someone who genuinely loves her job, I can tell you that this is far from true. Many so-called “dream” careers involve aspects that aren’t enjoyable – some can even be painful.

For instance, I recently saw a video about a ballerina, a profession often associated with passion. Yet, this ballerina ends her day by soaking her feet in a bucket of ice water, which doesn’t seem enjoyable at all. 

I believe this myth is the most damaging because it can lead people to quit jobs they might be good at and which could provide them the life they desire, all in pursuit of a passion that may still require a fair amount of work.

So, here’s my advice: stop searching for your passion and instead, become passionate about what you do! Yes, I’m suggesting that you fake it until you make it, and there’s science to support this idea. Studies have shown that even forcing a smile can make you feel happier. So, instead of fixating on finding your passion, learn to love your job.

How do you do that? Immerse yourself in your work. Identify the aspects you enjoy the most and strive to improve in those areas. Minimize the less enjoyable tasks, but also accept that every job – even the best ones – involves unpleasant tasks and tough days, sometimes even difficult weeks.

This doesn’t mean your life is destined for misery. More importantly, it doesn’t mean you should abandon your job in a potentially fruitless pursuit of passion. If you can’t seem to find passion in your current job, consider making subtle changes, either in what you do or where you do it, to move in a happier direction.

Remember that your career doesn’t have to fulfill all your needs. You can cultivate passions outside of the office. Start a family, write a novel, launch a nonprofit, fundraise for a good cause, explore a side hustle, or run for local office.

The happiest individuals lead rich, fulfilling lives that extend beyond their careers. Yes, some of the most famous, successful, and wealthy people are singularly focused on their passion, like athletes and artists. However, they were often born with that passion, and their lives are still filled with challenges and compromises.

There are many successful and even famous and wealthy people who became passionate about their careers over time.

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